De sentarme a escribir todos los días... a no escribir nada por mas de un año... así es la vida, no se si es que estoy seizing the moment o es que estoy seizing nothing at all. Y de repente viene un recuerdo que te activa, y te sienta a la vez. Así es mi mente... a veces en ingles, a veces en español, a veces libre, otras veces presa, siempre buscando, afuera, adentro....
And so... as a true dreamer... adventures to new places and relationships with new friends will bring me joy, but I can also go back to memories of old friends that make me smile, and make me want to go back. And then I think that maybe happiness also happens in the stillness between the future and the past, between an old adventure and the next. I get drunk on love... but I don´t rely on anything to make me happy or fill me up. I try to find a reason to be happy in the little things that are buried in the monotony of my everyday life (which lately is anything but monotonous, as chaos reigns in my corner of the world), because happy is not reserved for when life feels perfect, in fact it is what carries me when life feels hard. Happiness is rocking an 80´s rock song full blast in the dark because there is no power, and singing it at the top of my lungs, and having my girls join me and dance as if we are celebrating something grand.... or quietly listening to a power balad while I wait for Ari to fall asleep, and dream myself away. It is making coffee for one when I´m home alone. Is going on a moon walk just to take a picture of it, and post it with a perfect quote, because maybe... someone sees it and reads it and I make them happy! It is receiving a text from my sister, or smelling an old perfume.
As I read back on the paragraph I just wrote... I´m trying to figure out what it is I am writing about.... I started out wanting to write about the miss-happenings of living in this rundown country.., but no, I will not limit my world to what I can´t control, and I will be grateful for what I can. Yes, our government can cut off power, but it won´t shut close my eyes. At this point in my life I have figured out that I am happiest when I am most grateful, when I am aware of the world around me! Happiness is that moment of recognition when I know exactly what is making me happy, what is making me feel content. It can be as simple as the smell of coffee in the morning, or seeing the smile on my girls face when they get extra sprinkles on their ice cream, or when I tell them that they just did a wonderful job... these past days happiness was just knowing that we could sit in the dark as a family, that we were not alone, that this was a master class of resilience and strength for my innocent girls.
I want simple moments of gratitude to fill my life. I want my girls to here me gush about the world around me, so they too learn to feel grateful for a blue sky painted in pink in the morning, the smell of the sea, and the cool air under a good shadow! A frequent question you will often hear me say is... ¨you know what I love about right now?¨ and then magic happens as they search for hidden happies in the world around them.
Someday, maybe we will all perhaps understand the scope of our good fortune compared to a world where pain and suffering is a reality. Which is something we have experienced first hand living in Venezuela, and in the past several day spending more than 100 hours without power. During these days of anguish, I found myself and my girls enjoying little things in spite of their surroundings, they danced to music coming from my phone in the darkness, they were happy to do some star watching as we did when they were little, Ari said that the best bath she had ever taken was with the green bucket we used to get water out of the tank...she literally said it made her sigh with happiness. I hope they use their gratitude and recognition of blessings to do good and give back, to make changes, and help others. I don´t care so much that they say ¨thank you¨ often, I just want them to be grateful, to be happy under any circumstance, and find peace, love and strength in the little things around them, because sometimes... that is all they will have.
For now, I will enthusiastically praise a blue sky above me, I will sing until I embarrass whoever is with me, I will dance, I will enjoy a hug from my girls as a gift from heaven, I will see the moon and unity the stars when it is dark, and I will make sure that my girls can describe a blue sky with a collection of adjectives of happy! And I will drink in love from the world around me, and I will get drunk on it and dream happy, and I will be defined not by one love, but for all the loves I have!
Hi! my name is Carolina Perisse de Rico, I am a stay at home architect with the biggest project ever... my girls! The oldest is 16, then I have an 14 year old, and my miracle baby who is 6. Glad you are here, hope you stay a while!
Am now a member of Communal Global!!!